Homesick

Lately I have been really homesick.  Time is dragging, yet it's flying by at the same time.  How is that even possible?  Family and friends come to visit us and while I love seeing everyone, visits just mean saying goodbye and I dread that.  Reunions are so great, but every time I drive to the airport I can't help focusing on the drive I will make back to the airport to drop the person off.  Both my mom and dad have come out for visits lately and seeing them is great, but each time we part I feel so sad.  Families are so spread out in this day and age and it makes me sad.  Growing up, I had nearly all my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins closeby.  I wanted my kids to grow up the same way, knowing everyone by more than just a picture on the refrigerator and a voice on the phone.  When it comes down to it, family is all you have and family is what matters.  A big fancy house and pretty things don't matter if there's no one around to enjoy them with.  At the end of my life I want to look back and be satisfied.  I want to know that I spent all the time I wanted to spend with all the people I love.  I want my kids to see me making an effort to live close to loved ones so maybe in turn someday they will choose to live close to me.  The thought of my kids growing up and moving to the other side of the country (or worse, the world) terrifies me.  I don't know how some parents do it.  Calli has already promised to live next door to us when she moves out and I plan to coerce similar agreements from Serena and Jameson when they are of age.

Seriously though: what is more important than spending all the time you can with people you love?  I want this for my kids and selfishly, for me.  I want to bring my kids into my mom's store each week to get a cookie, like I did when I was younger.  I want my dad to coach Calli's soccer team.  I want to have Sunday bbqs with family, take day trips to the city, to the snow, to whereever.  I want the comfort of knowing that we're not all alone.  That someone is there, should we need help or a babysitter so we could actually have a date on our anniversary.  I want to show my kids the high school that their Daddy and I graduated from.  I want to show them my childhood home and all my old stomping grounds.  Of course I want them to have their own memories and traditions, but I want to share ours too and I want them to experience the things that we did.

Besides that, this California girl misses her home.  I think people will always take pride in their hometown and I know I do.  Living away for seven years has opened my eyes to the world around me.  I am glad that I have had the chance to experience new ideas and customs.  I have met people from all different states and countries and I know my geography a little better than I did in high school ;).  But, as Dorothy from my absolute favorite movie of all time says, "there's no place like home" and I've really been feeling this.  I know, I know: home is where you make it.  I have my family with me, we have a roof over our heads and we are truly blessed.  But I'm ready to click my heels now and get me the heck out of Oz and back over that rainbow where the grass is always greener...

My Dad on his visit in May

Grandma Molly painting Easter eggs with Calli

Grandma Keri and the kids

Me and Mom enjoying some margaritas

Grandpa Bob with Serena and Jameson searching for Easter eggs

Mom and me on her birthday...I am sure she will kill me for posting this pic, but I love it.

And finally, my wonderful family.  I know everyone thinks this about their kids, but seriously, we made some beautiful babies.  I can't tell you how many times I get complimented on my beautiful family and nothing could make me prouder.

If I left your picture out, I'm sorry.  It probably just means I don't have a recent one.  We love and miss everyone.