Rock N Roll!

I know I have really been slacking with my posts.  We've been so busy lately and I promise to catch up on the last few weeks when I get a chance.  For now my exciting news is that I have signed up to do my second half marathon: the Rock N Roll San Antonio.  I am so excited because these Rock N Roll marathons are supposed to be really fun.  They do them all over the country (someday I hope to do the one in San Jose).  The registration fee is a bit pricey compared to other races I have done, but this will be the first really large race I'll be a part of.  My other half marathon in Dallas was fun, but smaller.  The Rock N Roll marathons bring people from all over the US.  I am sure there are many who travel from place to place, doing each one; how fun would that be!

Anyway, this time around I am nervous, but more excited.  First of all, I know that I can run the distance because I have done it before.  And I am putting less pressure on myself and lowering my expectations.  I don't care how long it takes me to run, I am just going to get out there and do it.  As I always tell myself, there are many, many, MANY people in the world who are just sitting on their butts and so just getting out there is an accomplishment, whether you finish first or last.  This time around I have a more solid base of training to start off.  When I began my training last time I had run no more than three miles at a time.  Now not only have I run the 13.1 before, but I am starting out with a long run of six miles this weekend.  I have two months to train and am not going to put myself on a rigid schedule like I did last time.  My only requirements will be my Sunday morning long runs and any short ones I can get in during the week.  Luckily the weather will be cooling down soon (I HOPE!!!) so it should be easier to get out at night and run.

The date of the race is November 14th.  It was actually hard for me to decide whether to sign up or not because it is about more than just the physical aspect.  Signing up for a November race had me admitting that I will be stuck here in November, which is something I really, really, really did not want.  I try to keep positive about everything, but I feel trapped and hopeless at times, wondering if things are ever going to change, if I will ever be home.  I know eventually I will get there, but the years are slipping by and my kids are growing up faster than our relatives are able to keep up.  It has been seven years since I have spent a Thanksgiving with my parents and I miss it.  We had kind of a lonely Christmas last year and I'm starting to dread it again this year.  We have three wonderful, lively kids to keep it entertaining, but there are still things and people missing from the celebration.  Christmas to me is about family and that is who I enjoy surrounding myself with when the holidays come.  I am really big on the holidays and quiet celebrations don't cut it.  I feel like I keep saying "oh good, next time at this year I won't be here.  I won't have to spend another ____ here" (Christmas, summer, etc.).  But things just keep getting pushed back and life has other plans.  I try and go along with it and keep my chin up, but it's tough.

Anyway...this was supposed to be a happy post about the new race I'll be participating in.  Calli also might do her own Rock N Roll 1/2 mile the day before, but we haven't decided.  She has her last soccer game of the season that day (of course!) so there's a conflict in the time.  In the meantime she is working on running her own half marathon through a school program.  Every day we run 1/8 of a mile and soon we'll run 1/4 of a mile, working up to 13.1 miles in eight weeks I think it is.  She is excited about it and it's fun to share my running with her.

I'm sure I'll take to blogging about my running joys and hardships again, so stay tuned!!